i will begin by stating the obvious. its December. December tends to have some meaning does it not. melancholy, or something. the recent almost perfect for staying at home weather has come to an end, and already one can feel the stifling, suffocating, treacherous heat that seems about to dominate most of next year coming in.

quite frustrating, after reading a book for some amount of time, funny things tend to get inside my head. bits of stuff that might pass off as decent writing if written down. and some angst. 15 minutes later it disappears though, and i forget.

so how was 2006. recap i guess. started with orientation. that was pretty much the shittiest time of the year, imo. was waking up at 4 am everyday during orientation. didnt know many people. uhh make that anyone. laughter was forced and conversations awkward. oh well. thats just me i guess. the time after that was really quite blurred. everyday was mostly the same i guess. most of my year was in my thoughts. and we dont really remember thoughts, do we? or emotions. i mean we still can replicate them to some extent, while their scent lingers, but after awhile its only the shell of events we remember. i can look through my archives and remember i had meant something a little more, but cant recall what now. which is probably a pity. umm yes, so much for recap. to be continued.

So, its the new year. well, half an hour to it(yes its taken me that long to type that little, and no there wasnt much thought put into that). so what, lol. its not like it ever had any significance. the earth has gone one round, approximately, around the sun. if it were to be exact new year wouldnt fall at the stroke of midnight would it. that it goes in rounds and orbits should be enough to tell us one can never find beginnings or ends. but i guess since humanity decides this should be the time to take stock of the past cycle, and do stuff with themselves to prepare for the next, i should too lol. how then should new year be spent.

However it should be or might be, or how i want it to be, i have little or no clue. no matter, who gives a shit about the brief span of time between one year and another in the solar calender anyway. but theres always the little truths beyond the whole mess(which one need not give two shits about in the first place), that provide a little bit of a reason for a smile. for those, along with a whole lot of other things, i am grateful. and let that be a little truth.

i think dota has ceased to matter very much. think we all saw it coming lol. from a long way away. but hey, it was great. no, i dont think we choose our friends. at least its the ones we dont choose that we have stronger friendships with. (this is all non-confirmed btw) lol, seriously moca, u obviously know, i hardly liked u in s3. i do not know what inspired me to lend u the disc.(haha actually i do, and so do u =/) well i do know my reasons for getting it were not really reasons at all, so i guess thats the best thing i ever did with it. my best holidays, at least the ones i can remember, were those of sec3 december. ah yes i remember the routine. 1v1s and inhouse all day long =p. inhouses were so much funner, i dont really care if the standard sucked lol. well. honestly i didnt expect myself, or any of us to still be playing. so i remember winning xiong cz and danny(lol partly why i like sniper =/), and the stupid tournament, (even if we did get owned, the 2v2 the day before was incredibly fun lol) and winning that 1v1 tourney match. (last thursday of term 2, i remember, was bloody high after that, couldnt sleep for an hour+ after that, didnt really care) started out with dota, and went, still going, way beyond that. but well, since we're not playing anymore. It was Great. lol. therefore, to moca, xinrui, wangting, weiren, beedict, jenson, jishun(even if u never really played =p), jonnybai, shaun sim, shaosheng, ben koh, elbert etc etc, thanks. think i'll quit soon too, or at least reduce playing time by alot. playing alone is not much fun. well thats goodbye to the dota part of the so called dota club.(for tonight i will acknowledge the name ><). shitty comps, sianness, and better things to do with our lives have finally claimed all of us. lol.

So I Thank God For family. For old friends. For not-so-old friends( by now, new is hardly the right word). and well, for God.

and heres to next year. this year by now actually. to beginnings of beautiful things, strengthening, and good endings (for it will be a year of endings, no? though it makes me sad just thinking about it)

Alright. its January. whats January like, i guess i'll find out. gl hf gg pls no mh.