then everything went crazy

lol i know i shouldnt be here on the eve of the great As, but. ok so the last month has been spent slacking, and i havent mugged as much as i should have, and if i screw this up then i only have myself to blame. and my life appears to be slowly decaying o.O. oh yesh btw this isnt going to take 10 minutes, my previous posts mostly took like an hour lol

so i havent blogged about alot of things, like prelims and how emo i am about leaving rj and what i actually think of the school etc. etc. but in the spirit of my old posts, some of which inspire much cringing (only some, not as bad as it used to be lol) i shall discuss..what i've learnt ^.^. eh actually i already blogged about that in the last post o.O but nevermind.

so. firstly. i am not a nice guy. i must confess, lol ^_^. but as they say, self-knowledge is the first step to..something, i forgot what o.O. secondly. i should try to believe people sometimes. thirdly i'm too harsh on people, and myself, maybe. i know that contradicts my first point, but. fourthly, timing is everything. sometimes. whatever that means, lol. things might get screwed up, but i shall just have to learn that things are under control? future tense, hence not fifthly. fifthly, im sure theres more, but i should go do gp. it's not so much the memory, but what it means that ought to count. once again i only half-know what that means o.O

rawr.

gives, and takes away

boredom brings me back. ehh but then i dunno what to write. havent written anything proper since. wow i've never written anything proper, lol. not here anyway, and probably not in exams either, judging from grades. -.- but i ceased giving a damn about that a long time ago. which i suppose is a bad thing. heh but the words come out clear enough in my head.

man i really need to get down to mugging o.O. but there appear to be many distractions. two major exams in three months = major drainage of mugging energy.

bleagh.

okay anyway one important lesson that i've not really learnt over my relatively short (so far, at least) life would be that following ones better judgement is usually a good practice, despite its possibly extremely counter-intuitive nature. 'cause there are Consequences. lol. or rather, things to lose. conversely, not attending to ones compulsions has Benefits. so i just thought i would pretend to be a wise person and dish out wise-sounding advice -.-.

on another random note.
Conflict and Resolution have always been the basis for any substantial plot. i suppose that includes life -.o even if resolutions arent necessarily good all the time o.O

can never know.

haha okay its been awhile. brief respite from 1-sub-a-day mugging. or 2. leaving me quite bored. and pokemon having been nothing but a grand waste of time sees me deciding to cut down on it >.<. a little, lol. getting boring anyway. but i have just made the most astonishing discovery that pokemon moves use attack and special attack not based on the type of attack >.<. i.e. surf uses special attack while waterfall uses attack. which means i have been deluded for a very longgg time. papers were shit, and i dont think its hit me yet that these are prelims. in my visions from the start of the year im supposed to be starting to score As now. not going to happen. and school's out. =/ i actually dislike school most of the time, lol. still, school's one of the things that keep my life together and all. dota is another. can't play well anymore though, tried taking over from my brother after half an hour just now and got properly owned.

i think im supposed to be emo about school here or something. =/but too sleepy to continue. be back next month. or year or whatever >.<

Site will be temporarily(maybe) dead xD

little holes and light.

rawr. im starting to get a little panicky o.O h3 essay undone, havent touched two of the texts since beginning of this year/end of last year, brief notes on one of them. hmm. i wonder about the cause for all that apathy about work. lol. and i just discovered ali smith is a lesbian this afternoon -.- weather is depressing. its not raining outright, but sky looks threatening. looked threatening, now its just mildly...ugh. for lack of a better word. maybe stressing too much. maybe too little. and the rest is intangible. ^^

if thats what you want

i'm fine.i guess. haha while i actually feel like blogging (not doing maths) i might as well update.

i have spent almost the entire day in my room. and i fell asleep without switching off my laptop last night so im quite surprised it hasnt exploded or anything yet. Anyway. im serious about the entire day thing. still quite unproductive. lol and its friday already. hmm. and my table is like. art. also i am better able to grasp the full extent of the rate of hair dropping. and i realize that my floor is damn dusty. which may or may not be because my maid has no chance to sweep it since i'm always in here.

haha i think i might go crazy soon ><. from the being in one place for too long alone while resisting every temptation to dota. then again i am arguably already on that path -.-

my CTs are dead. like, really. i dont mind, really. lol. or at least part of me doesnt =/

my excellent prediction is that i will fall asleep without switching off the laptop again tonight. then i will end up sleeping on my specs again. or something. they are still in relatively good condition lol. well they dont cost >250 bucks for nothing i guess .

felt like doing the 10 people thing. awhile back lol. but nahhh. however, if you should want to know what i have to say to you (if i have anything to say to you at all) you may pay me a dollar and i shall personally send you an email! wow.

take that?

muahaha.

In his song

haha alright. today was a sunny day ^.^ not the stifling heat kinda sunny, but warm and windy i.e. nice. lawl, just thought i should document it. since they are rather rare. apart from that i really dont have much to say. i think i lag behind even moca in mugging :o. should start soonnn. then again ive never really done intense mugging before =/. and now i am struck by the urge to go play dota or something. ><

havent been sick in more than half a year, if i remember correctly. (then again my memorys not so good these days) anywayy, havent been sick in a long time. which makes it a lot worse when it comes.

currently my feet hurt, legs are aching, along with my back, and i have a headache and my eyes hurt(lol dont ask why, i dont know either) and my throat hurts. experience tells me that a fever is coming along soon. lol, and theres nothing to do. hence the whining. anyway i suppose it came from synod youth games. too much exertion for my (quite unfit) body to handle, i guess. and the rain -.-. no one else fell sick, so..lol should go train or something. lawl we got owned quite thoroughly in most departments i guess, but the last game was pretty good.

i have alot more to say, but so do you? =/

zzz.

It only gets harder the more that you know

woot thats first song ive played twice (on wmp) in a long long time. apart from new songs lah. lol still dont know what its about though. not entirely, anyway.

Anyway. today = first event pulled off. yay. lol things went alright. pretty good. and mingbao rocks, for coming up with most of the games ideas, and being cameraman+ director for the promos+ having this strange ability to not be frustrated with anything + bringing/making most of the logistics stuff. oh and rachel lu too, of course (why'd i end up doing most of the talking though lol). and team marshals and station marshals. and i srsly respect uncle kien seng for taking that group. non-christian turnout = 19. one convert woot.

well alright. not much to say. lol. kinda tired now, been doing stuff since...7. well running around at least. damn printer + photocopier.

eheh i feel like ending off with some angsty line or quote or something, but nope, uninspired tonight. g'night then. sleep tight.

Walk the Line

hmm i remember when i watched the show. i dont know how it won best picture, but it did. (if im not wrong) anyway it was pretty good lah. and when i grasped the significance of the title. i was quite impressed. i dont remember why ><. since its the title of one of his songs anyway. johnny cash's that is. anyway! today marks the day i first hear the song. on wen loongs blog. oO. (for people who know who wen loong is....thats how bored im getting)(not that wen loongs blog is boring or anything) woot. its a nice song. for something from that era =p. nice husky voice the guys got o_O

so. i should be working. but when faced with too much work one tends towards escapism. my desk. is in a mess. i miss my old file. all there was to do was chuck everything inside. currently cant be bothered with putting stuff back inside. so now my table has many many stacks of worksheets and i cant remember how theyre sorted out lol. grah.

mmm today. was busy, to say the least. church was kinda...strange. no further comment lol. and the streetdance thing was pretty nice ^.^ couldnt exactly see the whole stage, but...whatever lol. im getting to know j1s too. met bennett and longkuan on my way to intended location: esplanade library, an hour early. followed them to starbucks. broke longkuans space impact high score, rawr. and the whole brandon kwan incident was. welllll. interesting ^^

right. should start working. >.<

April fools.

Alright lim min so you were right, it does rain a lot in April.

Everythings moist, decaying and eroded. Hold on to whatever you've got, dont get washed away. and sorry, if sometimes i forget. argh.

Havent blogged in ages. okay lah half a month. sian =p. April sucked. for almost everyone i know. now if April was anyone's favourite month of the year tell me and i will go over and shake your hand. but. oh well. if God has a plan, then i guess everything that happens happens for a reason. just not really fun when that reason is to test. hmph. we'll all get by, somehow and eventually. time solves everything?

I have a theory that everyones life becomes plain ol' weird sometimes, for no fathomable reason. okay its not very original. emphasis is on the everyone. if that makes it any less nonsensical. so at some point or other people start adopting Unwell as their theme song lol. and this is like, a lot of people.

Church is occupying an increasing amount of space in my life. which is good, i guess. second finger still a little numb from carrying the curry chicken yesterday oO. starting to talk to people and all. basically, im becoming sociable. shock. and my lack of inspiration for the pre-E outreach programme vaguely alarms me. lol.

It feels pretty good writing something thats not an essay. after half a month. ^.^ lol. May soon. if recent weather patterns (hoho what patterns) are anything to go by its going to be damn hot. wonder how it'll turn out. much labour or something. lol. damn why are As this year. Must mug ><

Okay enough angst lol. but hey, that felt good.
Edit: nice sunset. =)

this is how i know it's real.

it's always been like this, yar?
Fine. i admit lol. me today = moderately emo. quite silly. i mean very silly.
firstly, thanks, i appreciate it. even if its not explicitly stated. (well now it is ><) explicit isnt exactly my favourite word anyway.
secondly, you know what it's like, i guess. maybe?
thirdly, dont you dare feel troubled. it's really mine to sort out lol. i am, after all, a bloody guy. oh, and i will.

In other news. my cheeks hurt (still). yz anniversary on saturday. i was the miscellaneous help guy, being six hours early and having no specific purpose there. after awhile, i became one of the two pioneering members of the balloon blowing committee! then the electric pump spoilt. so ended up having to do it manually. uhh the other people came and helped after band prac, and about 4 hours was spent blowing balloons. quite fun really. XD. i mean amusing to watch people with balloon phobia. anyway it was about 300 balloons(i think?) between less than 10 people over 4 hours. so thats...quite pro. lol. except later all of them were burst. =/ and we didnt even get a photo. oh right me fingers were hurting yesterday. cause i take more time to tie a balloon than to inflate it.

oh and theres the outreach prog on may 19. im on the 3-man planning committee. and its supposed to be bigger than yz anniversary, so i...really wonder how this is going to work. life is getting a little busier. anyone wanna come. =/ lol

what lies beneath

nebulous, by the way, is mondays word of the day. such an intriguing word. :P

So. it's time for a not-so-nebulous update. i shall cease discussing my state of mind/whatever. always ends up..nebulous. problem is, i havent much idea what to write. so. umm this'll be alot like old times!

alright. long weekend = relatively busy. friday had good friday service@expo. and...im in the planning commitee for pre-e event. (planning committee currently = 3 people) cause only 2 people replied the sms. oO. anyway my generation of ideas for these things kinda sucks. but oh well. lol i can point out alot of flaws though ><. then train ride #1 from expo to civil service club. bowling with phang and lk. umm yay phang owns me now. train ride #2 home. Saturday comes along. train ride #3 to little india. umm writers cip meeting. attendance seven. basically i turned up half an hour late and just. listened to them talk. lawl. the external volunteer appeared to have been left out of all the rj-exclusive talk. train ride #4 home. an hour later, train ride #5 to city hall. dinner with 4i people ^^. best attendance in a longlong time. i miss the old brand of humour sometimes. and we walked alot. originally with purpose. originally. oh and weiren has biceps.:Dtrain ride #6 home. alright i know 6 train rides in 2 days doesnt seem like alot, but by my 4th train ride i was really sick of the whole thing ><. hmm sunday. easter service. which was quite pro. then went to...buy a piano for sister. nothing interesting there though. right. so anti-climatic. lol

about time i blog, i guess. its kinda stagnating, but these days there are no conclusions to anything, or thoughts get themselves tied up.

alright. stuff over the last few days. saturday was kinda shitty. i was rudely awakened, at 530, for...no fathomable reason. anyway the moon was. big and round and bloody red (no pun). had to put on my glasses and check i wasnt dreaming, lol. then the latter half of the day (i.e. after getting home from bs) was spent in a foul mood. all the way till sunday morning. so uhh. sunday stuff was alot better. went lanning. for four hours. after qing ming.

bleagh this post was supposed to be up on tuesday or something. so the last paragraph is really supposed to be longer. heh but whatever. things have been going quite haywire lately, grades and all. sometimes faith wears thin and walls start trembling. but i'll make it through. just like before. in fact we're all going to make it. hope for it. ><

and i dont always know what to say, or what to do. eloquence was never something i had. but i'll be around.

between believing the best and assuming the worst, i tend towards the latter. hard as i may try. been that way since. forever. it also happens that i appear to possess the extraordinary ability to construct, from the presence/absence of things, long complicated trains of thought that get derailed, and end up having to start from the beginning. damn paranoia. lol. Faith. =/. in God, that is. (dont worry this has nothing to do with anyone or anything. seriously.) i'll try. meanwhile, bear with me. lol.

on another note, i dont do engineering. o_O
eh, this is a really short post, but whatever. lol.

this is just to say.

chem owned me. completely. on the other hand, cts are over. then again, highness about it only lasted like 5 minutes. now, i = abit tired. so my eyes tell me. okay. anyway, its been....2 weeks of slacking + mugging + everything else. lol. thanks =p.

anyway#2, yay. 3 days of slacking, ooh. then back to school. we need proper holidays.

anyway#3. hmm. right, wanted to blog on sunday, but wasnt (that) free. umm. youth sunday. lol, service felt alot...different (better). when serving. even if it was just ushering. plus get to pose in long sleeved shirt. and...accumulate hand-shaking experience.

anyway#4. no more. =/. eh, i dont know what to blog about anymore. having to resort to changing colours as substitute. lol. dhoom approaches.

One night of desolation #2

alright. i cant access msn. -.-. or hotmail. they say its no good to 'keep everything inside'. so im just going to...rant.

anyway. i've tried everything. lol. except downloading yahoo msnger, but i thought that might be a little extreme. i think its the damned router (since i've tried using my brothers comp as well). if thats the case the router can go eat shit and die. incidentally this is major problem # 2 with the router/wireless, not including random connection problems. problem#1, discovered yesterday : i get disconnected when my sister shuts down her comp. damn wireless adapter. alternatively it could be the msn server problem, but thats quite unlikely. plus asking around wouldnt be very convenient. -.-

okay so this isnt the first time this is happening. its #2, i think. not including the night of desolation#1, where msn server got screwed (but even then i had windows msnger). the last time...my mom fixed it. lol. i have no idea about my moms actual level of techno proness. bleagh. probably ask her later.

in other news, my mugging is damn screwed up. i mean it ><

lol maybe she wont be able to fix it, then maybe i'll actually start mugging. instead of wasting time trying to fix the damn thing. hoho bnet is working fine though.

[edit] the thing started working after i published this. @_@
who am i kidding this is such a weak rant. lol.
[edit#2] screwed up again. wtf.

Exhale Deeply.

lol this is supremely stupid. i think i fail my logic. and common sense. the presence of the 'i think' would seriously bring to question the accuracy of the statement. knowing that one is being -insert negative quality- (and it is unwarranted) doesnt make it any easier to stop it. so im sorry. lol.

anyway. got screwed by chem test quite badly. that shouldnt really matter, since i lost 15 notes, scanned randomly selected pages of 15b, did the same for 16. all the same i would gladly fall for mssoh's...sort of tactic. motivation is a good thing. cts are coming. watch me. lol.

sigh. hardly motivation actually. not going to last. i should start mugging. oh, and i used to be good. always thought i was, anyway. still do, maybe.

one or two people in class are How to Save a Life crazy. i actually like the song ( it was perfection of first misinterpretation, sometime late last year. actually i mentioned it in passing) but i might soon start referring to it as 'that damn song' at this rate. funny thing is i never quite managed to figure out what it really means. the confusion is primarily due to the presence of three protagonists, i think. heh i dont think many people really could, judging from all the weird youtube videos involving suicide. and other foolish ways of dying (actually i only watched one, at weirens request). well it was grammy nominated. not that i think it deserving of winning, but...the dixie chicks won. =/.

the next two weeks look like a lot of shit. saturday please come. (evening, the rest of the day looks to be really screwed up. and...i saw that.)

there. all better ^^. and dont ask please.

=/)

yay. gp is done. paper is weird. i screwed it up. i think. i dont care lol. i will not think about the rest of the papers and the dismal state of my revision.

been a long time since i blogged. i think i forgot how to. sigh okay. anw i are kinda tired. today whole class was tired ><. maybe my being tired has something to do with the 3 hrs of talking crap with crunch and phang (and later lim min)(and earlier longkuan) after school. its quite mad lah just sit there and talk and talk and talk. actually listen to all of phangs 'did you know's. intended to go home at 3, then 315, then 430, then 445. actually went home at 6 oO. but quite fun lah. lol. the day before was spent trying to do work with lk and phang, but ended up talking crap with lk and phang till 530.(lol i just remembered the lit essay. shit) phang is the constant, obviously. i just cant decide if the phang came first or the crap came first.

hmm. and my moods been swinging quite badly in school lol.

lol i think i've been quite the asshole (or emo) the last few days. that is to say, being less sensitive than usual, and basically giving less shit about anyone apart from myself. i'm not reproaching myself about it though. (does that make me an asshole still lol). hmm. maybe i should be that way more. more selfish, to quote anonymous person (in case he objects to his identity being revealed). some things affect you more than you thought they would. some things affect you more than you thought they would, and theres relief, because theres truth there, and truth can never be absolutely bad oO.

well, if i happen to have offended anyone, my apologies. (thought chances are you probably would have started it -.-. just so happens i might have been more volatile than usual) i should be (almost)back to normal now, i think. i could credit dota for that. it helps blank out emotional state. unless some you get into a virtual argument with some idiot.

brevity of whine.

i think i could laugh at myself. days are longer in the shortest month, and i want to sleep.

lol duno why i tire so easily nowadays. nowadays being..since saturday? think its the cnys fault. like wth i saw relatives on my fathers side for 4 consecutive days. as a result of my being quite tired (damn maths, and im still at 11a) this post will be void of intellectual stuff. or anything remotely funny. hmm humour has been in short supply the last week+.

so. since last week: my very own laptop. oO. got windows vista summore. which is quite cool but the entertainment sucks. they record ur minesweeper win rate. mine is like 4% currently. as such i have decided to switch my primary source of entertainment when theres nothing to do. it was Chess Titans for awhile (which is basically chess), but now its Mahjong Titans (which is basically match-the-tiles). dont look down on it, playing it for extended periods of time (which really dont seem very long) results in sianness to the highest degree, and potential headaches. zzz this morning i thought of resolving to play nothing but dota. hasnt worked out.

chinese new year. dont want to talk about it.

miscellaneous. so many things to do. so little time i dedicate to them. really screwed. oh and i think my scandal saturation levels are reaching maximum capacity. if that made sense. therefore i have decided to take a break from discussing old/overdiscussed scandals. which is basically almost everything. lol. okay tired liao dont want type liao =p

Once, upon a forever

hmm. happy valentines day, or something. hmm. how long it has been. Very, i think. least it seems that way.

anyway. since i last blogged: my house is pretty much..pretty. right. kay wdv its looking quite good. my life is currently not falling apart, tyvm. my understanding of the damn lectures and status on tutorials, though, is still the same.

on my 18th valentines day: save some random stuff, rather uneventful. but relatively, eventful. quite stupid, actually. lol. so nothing much actually happened apparently. but longkuan got a rose. it would appear his pri sch classmates all like him very much. or someone else does. i got ego marshmallows from lk. oO. and i have a story to tell someday. lol too much chocolate doesnt feel very good.

chinese new year approaches. and woot i just threw away a whole bunch of hongbaos. (and removed the money) (see last or last last post) i love my efficiency.

But who gives a shit about the hongbao when what really matters is whats inside. lawl.

(woops, deleted part n/a anymore)

doesnt matter anymore

kay honestly i still do not get it. been rather moodswingy lately. if lit is in my blood then i must be losing a lot of blood.

anyway my room is almost up. that is to say i now have aircon. yay. and it is now painted. orange ftw. double yay. and my table is uber neat, cos all the mess is in a box. and there is now cable. and i can access the internet, so its back to the old routine. and woot the laptop is currently in my room, which is a first. old routine meaning i can waste a lot of time basically staring at the screen waiting for the sky to fall. well the internet free days have been a lot more bearable than expected. sunday was absolutely shitty, internet withdrawal at its best. monday i was hanging around school the whole day, got home like 10+ , so there was hardly any chance to miss msn/dota. plus there was internet at lks house oO. tuesday...lol was at home for like 3 hrs? spent the 3 hrs downstairs. renovations kinda left the place in conditions unfit for doing anything. started reading screwtape letters again. clive staples is some sort of genius guy with a whole lot of sense. and later went to timbre (?) either timber, or timbrei, wdv. mm. well now i have back internet so take it away even for a day and i am going to suffer from severe withdrawal again. and i am falling asleep. so i appear to be typing stuff to myself(and typing nonsense inconsequential sentences) again. damn homework.

to the stars.

woot i am wide awake. i am moving tomorrow. how does one say goodbye, even to a house (an echo-riddled one).

on a separate note this house was really the reason for my changing primary schools. and who knows where i would be now if i hadnt moved. somewhere quite different, no doubt. still in this school, i think. but. lol. but if God had a plan, has a plan, then i guess it could not have happened any other way.

its a full moon tonight. some bloke on radio says its called the snow moon. the full moon at this time of the year. anyway. i am out of here, into that shithole. for now its a shithole anyway. who knows what its going to be like, after renovations.

anyhow, you're not likely to see me online for the next five days. at least. so its no msn or dota for the next 5 days. its not going to be pleasant, but after so long, i think i can endure that. lol. well. goodbye then.

99

posts, roses, and the ka-tet of nineteen and ninety nine. fine dont mind me lol. i am freaking bored. i was freaking bored about 3 hours ago as well, so i went looking through my old posts, trying to recall what the hell was going on in my life when i was typing them. lol. you know what, i realized ive lost my old sense of humour. the one that inspired shellfish stories.

anyway its february. i realized i once wondered what january would be like. lol. i duno really. the weather, in the most literal sense, has been nice though. but if the first two days of february are anything to go by...well, january might seem alot better.

anyway(again), happy birthday to uhh wts mom(1st), lim mins dog(2nd), mocas dad(3rd), and ann tay(4th). sigh. thanks for the present btw =). i think i know of a few things i want done by 19. but well. thats for closer to 19 lol.

Rest aint rest

and holidays aint holidays when your head is full of things. like uhh. i should a) do my homework and listen during lectures(wtf@vectors), b) stop being so damn paranoid and assuming the worst, its not fair to the people/events in question, c) start writing (i had my first line a few days ago, but thats forgotten now)(correction, it goes, a passing car sends light and shadow gliding through the thin lace curtain and across the room. or something. hmm its decent i think ><), d) finish packing my stuff, which would inevitably include, at some point or another, e) filing all of last years worksheets. also i should f) try and replace my gc before the damn warranty runs out, which i think is pretty soon, if its not already gone, along with (parents) 175 bucks. lol.

i think there is a little elaboration to be done for d). so i've been trying to sort out my stuff. rusty dusty things that persist in their existence. some items worthy of mention would include my old mickey mouse piggy bank (some random foreign coins included), a bottle of dried glue( yes whatever was inside kinda solidified), my old postcard collection (which was contained in a photo album)(if thats what you want to call it, self-created cover page made using that old crap software with the purple guy who went by the name mcgee (wth was it called)), and my old pin collection. as you can clearly see there i used to collect things for the sake of them =/. oh right and money oO. which i nearly threw away. plus i did a thorough examination of the top drawer, as i always do when moving, and sometimes when im not moving. usually i just take the class photos (which date back to p3) and stare at them(and crap i lost the p1/p2 ones), but this time i examined all the old birthday cards as well. (from the time when i still called my parents papa and mama and my sisters name was undecided, and was therefore known as baby). lol. ah well. theres some random other photos from random long-agos. like uhh zomg i had one with council head! and the rest of the prefects and asst moniter/ess and monitress from p3 lol. haha and thats about all i have to go by. what little i remember has probably been distorted beynd recognition. and some from australia, back in p5? and some from...the birdpark/reptile garden. when it was exciting to take pictures of animals. lol, probably still would be. and not one, but two passport sized photos of myself from...somewhere between p1 and 4 lol. handsome, charming, sweet little boy that i was then. aww.
ah well. rusty dusty stuff from long ago. that for reasons unknown persist in their existence.

lol. ignore me. anyway. there was good weather today(imo). for about 2 hours. before it got hot =/. occasional bouts of really nice weather these days. relative to the last few months that is. stupid singapore weather/global warming, on permanent mood swings. also, the holidays seem to have severely crippled my academic ability. and. Cramped my Style. lmao. blogging style, anyway.

one last thing =/. just the other day, i mean yesterday lol, i was considering the moon's pathos. though i would love to show off my depth of insight, that would make this paragraph sound more corny than it already does, so i'll leave you to derive it yourself if you think yourself really really bored. its funner =/. i mean less unfun. lol. (wow@number of typos/punctuation errors. half asleep at 9+ oO)

All right

almost. wdv. lol. they played How to Save a Life on class95 today (?!). alright, theyre getting angsty now (and a little outdated). hmm actually its supposed to be anti-angst(?) but sounds damn angsty anyway =/.

yesterday was find-out-about-your-siblings-love-lives day. as i both found out who my sister likes and found my brothers (relatively new) blog >.<. the first does not really warrant any comment, but the second...i reserve comment. here, anyway. he also tried to find out how to fold paper roses, i find out today. i think i can claim credit for that =/. maybe i should teach him lol. whatever the case im not visiting his blog anymore ><. looking at history is damn stalker behaviour lol.

in other news my lack of efficiency the whole year has been mildly frustrating. in my room i tend to devote my attention to whatever the radios playing and/or walking around. and in front of the comp is just in front of the comp. lol maybe all that will change once i move, and then i will have both the radio and be in front of the comp, and a bed. and there will be so much to distract me i will just have to work.

and i can only remember the answer.

this is really quite irrelevant and non-intelligent and all, but if anyones wondering where have all the cowboys gone, i think theyre all singing their sad sad songs. okay nevermind, dont think anyones going to get it but me. wow i can entertain myself. lol as for the rest, i think i'm losing it =(. oh well.

the weeks been...good. lol. now if i could only understand vectors, econs(i dont even know the damn topic), and bring myself to do my homework. speaking of homework i think there is quite alot of it. and today was almost entirely spent in church, and so will a large chunk of tmr, so im quite screwed. as i was saying, today was almost entirely spent in church, doing mostly nothing lol. oh right there was this inscribe a bible thing which i was persuaded to wait around(i.e. play lan) for 4 hrs for. basically they give people bible verses to handwrite, and compile them together. so no matter how small, ugly, unreadable and full of things to complain about my handwriting may be, a copy of revelations chapter 8 written in it is going to be sent to Israel oO. umm. yay i guess. lol. making history, they say. perhaps, but i think i've made better histories than that lol. hmm. damn, im running out of things to say too.

w4s

lol first things first! happy birthday weiren and raja =p.

and so i realize i havent much to say.

oh well. wdv. had j1 orientation today. for writers. i must say i think i was quite sociable. anyway since we finished the stupid thing like 3o minutes before everyone else was sitting around doing more or less nothing. well i told the only joke i remember (the black knight one) but nvm. then i posed my love life question to the j1s, and a girl commented on the lack of selection in rj. ..and i decide to reserve comment. draw ur own inferences pls. hmm. having j1s around reminds me of ncc lol.

amazing how people can go on so little. or have to. or think they have to. just take my bloody h3 lit. i think the only reason i had courage enough to take it was cos of albar. or at least what she said. and wth who knows how much she meant it anyway. mightve been nice sounding parting words lol. and if she was wrong..well then i guess...she would have unintentionally screwed me up. oO. oh well. wdv. stuck here already, might as well just do it.

and i really need to learn to work in front of the comp. seriously doing nothing -.- and my file next to me just to make me feel a little better. how unproductive. think i'll try spending my night some other way today.

11/1

as one might know, today happens to be the 11th of January. i must say i think i should be quite grateful for it(today being the 11th that is), as i started the day determined to go through it completely free of any negative..stuff. genuinely cheery, in other words. aye, unfortunately, the day seemed to want to test me or something. see first there was the unfortunate accident of my having taken some relatively sexy pants in the darkness that was my room. now i usually would have borne it with all my usual good humour. and no, they who seemed bent on causing me uhh. torment? did not succeed very much. rather, thanks to the aid of lactic acid buildup produced by anaerobic respiration, resulting in a feeling very much like a cross between wanting to puke and waking up after a short afternoon nap, succeeded rather in irritation. therefore, if anyone happened to feel..ignored? (i duno) Whatever. lol. in addition to that, my calf happened to cramp somewhere in the canteen. whatever would i do without moca :D. oh right some fishing car stopping at the bus stop happened to not notice the large puddle of water, and me, standing there. luckily only my shoes and abit of my pants were not spared. -.- and uhh the two teachers standing behind the bus stop under a single umbrella to avoid potential accidents like the one that had befallen my shoes must be credited for their...ability to anticipate everything. after all, though buses are considerate enough to slow down, there are lots of cars that happen to drop people off at the bus stop.

lol this post reeks of...i dont know what. something that i do not like sounding like. adding more swear words and simplifying the language might help i guess. anyway, apart from that, my day was almost perfectly fine. though who knows what mightve happened if today didnt occur..today. uhh right. lol. since a line stretches to infinity, it is impossible to get to the other side without either crossing it, or erasing it. sounds intelligent doesnt it? hold on, while i try to figure out what it could possibly mean.

Things.

you know how there are some things in life that seem too coincidental to be pure coincidence. like csc used to say, there is no such things as coincidences in life. something like that, the frequency(if thats the word) interfered with my hearing ><. like ummm. what is the probability of you dialling the wrong number, but the person who picks up the phone has the same name as the person u intend to call. =o.
was reading pride and prejudice the whole afternoon at home. uhh trying to anyway. btw my afternoon was computer free =o. i say trying to because there appeared to be some party at my house today. of course i missed out on most of it, as i was on a self-imposed exile to my room. (another one of) my brothers friends was there when i came back, then left, then my sisters school bus friends/our sort of neighbours(and their neighbours) from the nearby apartments came over. so between the high pitched screaming, stampedes, and the opposite neighbours (another one) dogs barking(apparently its kinda bored cooped up in the house and wants to play with kids and their bicycles/skate scooters) and my radio one cannot expect me to get much work done. but wattheshit theres so much to be done. and my sisters school bus friend is a most interesting character. for a p4 kid, anw. comes into my room, wonders what i could be doing (doesnt find out :), but honestly a good question), cant pronounce literature and essay (><) , comments on my being from raffles, leaves, and disallows me from locking my door lol.

Right.

new template. i mean colours. yay for blogger beta thats not beta anymore. now i dont have to search for html colour codes -.-. yes i guess i am quite obsessed with lime green. lol. alright moca which one hurts ur eyes more.

Days of feeling invincible

lol remember the days when we all used to confuse invincible with invisible? confusion is justified though, maybe. one need only watch the invisible man.

eh, this post has no point, really. nothing to do on a Saturday afternoon. (this one could hardly be called unpleasant though) the computer seems to object greatly to my playing dota. restarts, leavers and fatal errors are its most powerful weapons. and the laptop is too lagged. Maple has proven to be so mind numbingly boring that there is inclination not to use pots and just regenerate while reading pride and prejudice. which, btw, has one of the ugliest covers i have seen on a book. i am tempted to use my shiny reflective golden bookmark and put it about a third of the way down the cover. and well, cover. a strip of it. also i believe i have discovered why them bookmarks have messages printed on them, especially christian ones. for example mine is entitled Serenity Prayer. not that it helps very much. too thin!

however it has proven to be relatively interesting, if supposedly relatively bimbotic. though watching the movie and knowing the whole plot kinda makes you look at eliza bennet and darcy differently. certainly not as smart as one would think her without knowing the rest of the story, though clever relative to her sisters nonetheless.(hmm alot of relations in the book too) of course ive barely started so this opinion might not justified. okay this is perhaps only the second time i have started on the book before the teacher does so i guess thats a good sign. whatever the case i am sure we will all have fun writing long interesting essays on our theories of love, or whatever kind of question one could possibly set for the book.

lol, was extremely bored last night when i chanced upon someones (i duno i think i'll keep it anonymous) old blog, to which i appeared to be the third distinct(if my maths isnt screwed up, distinct=different?) visitor cos almost no1 knew about it. anyway i happened to be featured(well not the main one obviously) in one particular episode (uhh yes i looked through the archives). anyway i was like. i appear to be unable to find appropriate words, but i suppose it was something like (=o)(well i wouldnt say i was at a loss for words, didnt fall off my chair or anything, and woohoo a smiley. !.)the following will sound quite cheesy, but yea i guess ur right it is rather(ahh fine, not rather) tempting to join in the mass of angst(and of course its good friends anger and bitterness), decipherable (or indecipherable, though what would that make it?) that can be found advertised to the public. amazing how someone you know could be going through that much without you ever knowing. (though i daresay some would prefer knowing). therefore to those who resist temptation, and find it in themselves to go through stuff more or less alone.(come to think of it thats almost everyone. i think. maybe its an obligation lol. feel like quoting some lines from pnp ><><)

Obligation

is part of life.

i appear to have left my pencil case in school, most likely in the hall. in which case it would have long been ripped apart by j1s. or they might wave it around in the air and ask whose it is, but of course its no ones, so who knows what they're gonna do with it then. i'm not exactly weeping though. anyway its been with me for quite a long time, so heres an obligatory tribute to the various items in there, and a brief description.

Blue pens-free, about 20 more in the cabinet.
Pencils-free. and no lead. cant seem to find any in the house.
Stapler-very old, very cranky. flips open without warning. pencil cap tends to get stuck in there.
Highlighter-free gift.
Pencil case-free gift.
Red pen-runs out of ink sometimes.
Drug abuse badge-no comment.
Ruler-25 cents
Correction tape-its pink.
Keychain thing thats really a handphone accessory- uh brought back from some european country. ouch.

haha whatever. think i'll miss my blue pen though, the one with the papermate logo almost completely faded. it miraculously never ever ran out of ink, or got screwed, despite my uhh dropping it numerous times.

in other news my resistance to sleep during chem lectures seems to have diminished somewhat. plus i get tired damn easily. work faster next time, mister brain.

chem tutorials look like theyre gonna be pretty fun. not looking forward to seeing her angry though.

zz forgot what else i had to say.

Forecast

Really good! (haha i just erased an entire paragraph of sarcastic potentially hurtful comments on the forecast for this year. but then i realized i might be exposed. so thats gone, which is probably a good thing, cos i was feeling pretty bad. after all, people have done nothing to deserve flaming. yes. i should be less cynical of them. after all my first impressions have mostly proven themselves to be overly harsh. just take my first impressions of the class and vadi ><. well anyway. going to miss vadi, gwee. the year looks like its going to be full of...work. everyones favourite activity. also looks like its going to be dry, boring, and filled with..unoriginal stuff that we've all heard too many times already, since pri sch i think. at least as far as teachers are concerned. well at least lit doesnt look too bad, according to wt. and pnp looks infinitely funner than othello. this is before i have touched the book btw)

ignore whats in the brackets pls.